Some feelings don’t need an official clinical diagnosis. Case in point: empty nest syndrome. If you’ve experienced your children moving out, you know what this means. It’s an odd blend of confusion, relief, emptiness, and curiosity. You’re proud of your children but unsure what to do next. After all, so much of a parent’s life is wrapped up in, well… parenting.

For some folks, empty nest syndrome can feel like a deep void. Your identity is being challenged and, of course, that can be daunting. You and your partner may be staring at each other and asking, “Now what?”

Symptoms of Empty Nest Syndrome

Loss of purpose
Recognizing marital problems that were previously obscured
Depression
Difficulty adapting to such a major change
Anxiety about your children
Feeling rejected or abandoned
Confusion because you can also identify some upsides to the change
Regret about the time not spent with your kids

Becoming a parent is one of the biggest decisions you ever made. An empty nest doesn’t change your parental status but it sure alters your perception of parenthood. However, you’re not alone. This is a common scenario and useful coping strategies do exist!

5 Tips For Empty Nesters to Keep in Mind

1. Create Communication Guidelines and Boundaries

This will require patience and collaboration. You want to know what your kids are doing. They probably want to update you, too. But how much is too much? Should you follow each other on social media? Is texting enough? Can you randomly call when the mood strikes? Work together to set guidelines but agree to revisit them if necessary.

2. Revive Your Romance

You’ll be lonely. The house will feel empty and quiet. But… having kids has a way of hindering the sex lives of parents everywhere. Focus on each other. Set up date nights. Find new interests together. Best of all, be spontaneous!

3. Prioritize Yourself

What did you like to do before becoming a parent? What new interest or hobby has caught your eye? This is a golden opportunity to explore and indulge and reinvent. It’s also your chance to commit to a daily self-care practice. Safeguard your eating, sleeping, and activity habits. Cultivate some relaxation techniques, too.

4. Embrace New Goals, Interests, and Challenges

Speaking of exploring, you and your partner can establish goals that don’t relate to soccer games or parent-teacher meetings. You can redecorate, throw dinner parties, plan a vacation, or volunteer to do charity work. Get creative!

5. Reimagine Your Personal Roles

You both have played many roles in your lives. Some of those roles are ongoing. Others come and go. Who do you see yourself as in two months or two years? You can be “Mom” and also be a “local community activist.” Dad will remain “Dad” but, at the same time, try his hand at being a “gym rat.”

When the Change Feels Overwhelming

There is absolutely no shame in needing help during this time of transition. You need to grieve. You need to process so many factors, including the concept of aging. It helps to lean on family and trusted friends. But you may need more help than that. A phase of your life has ended and it can be powerful to talk with an experienced guide.

Your weekly therapy sessions can provide you with a safe space to explore all that you are feeling. No one is expected to move perfectly through life’s phases. Having the support of a skilled professional can be invaluable. If empty nest syndrome is overwhelming you, let’s talk. Please read more about family counseling and reach out to set up a free and confidential consultation so we can get the process started.

Facing an Empty Nest? 5 Tips to Keep in Mind